I just found out that I have to travel for work. Not until March, but I just love to get anxious about it welllllll in advance! I am going to a meeting in which I am flying and staying for two nights. The reservations are all made.
I must say that I am proud of myself for one thing. I found out that there is another coworker going and she told me that she was flying out at 6:00 in the morning to be at 9:00am meeting!!! It is doable, but not for me. And not because of my physical health, but for my mental health. I have to take a bunch of medication at night and I am still so groggy in the morning that the thought of an hour’s drive to the airport (which would mean waking up around 3:00am), checking in, flying, getting a taxi and racing to a meeting sounds basically impossible for me. I discussed with my boss the fact that an early flight would not work for me for health reasons, and she was perfectly fine. She said to book my flight the day before and get a room for an extra night. Success! I do have to say that my boss is somewhat aware of my mental health issues, but I didn’t have to go into any detail, as I shouldn’t have to. Having to “hide” our mental illness from our employers can be so very difficult and can amplify symptoms, I am thankful that I work somewhere that is understanding.
Back to my anxiety. I am ok with flying, I actually kind of enjoy it. What gets me is the whole checking in at the airport, the hotel, the meeting…having to interact with people and getting settled. I have done this before so I know I will be ok, but I just get stuck with nervousness that is well- – anxiety ridden!!!! Probably the worst part is the meeting. I can’t stand “networking” with people, I really can’t handle having to stand around chit chatting with people. Most of the time I try and find a place off to the side where I can go stand up or go for a breather if I need to. I have no idea how many people will be at this 2-day meeting or what to expect so that adds to the stress. The coworker that I am meeting there is so very nice, but I think she has worse anxiety than I do!!!!! I don’t know if that will help me or not!
Alas, I will try to keep it out of my mind. I do have almost 2 months to worry about it!! Anticipatory Anxiety sucks!!! A brief definition from AnxietyUK helps with understanding this: “Anticipatory anxiety is where a person experiences increased levels of anxiety by thinking about an event or situation in the future. Rather than being a specific disorder in its own right, anticipatory anxiety is a symptom commonly found in a number of anxiety related conditions, such as generalised anxiety.” For a more indepth article with some hints (that I need to remember!), click here.
How are you with traveling? Is it worse if it’s for work, or maybe personal? Do you have anticipatory anxiety? Would love to hear your thoughts and until March..I wil TRY not to be anxious about this trip!!
Take Care
Jenny
